After my family said, “Happy New Year 2025,” we experienced the sudden deaths of two family members one week apart—my mom and my oldest son-in-love. Both deaths were unexpected and deeply painful, and they ushered me into an unknown space called grief.
During the first few weeks, I asked the Lord many questions and knew that I had to press into Him during my confusion and sorrow. After all, He promised me a sound mind (“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind,” 2 Timothy 1:7), which I desperately needed. I knew there was no “right way” to grieve, and that grief didn’t require me to choose between my mom and son-in-love. God was inviting me to walk through waves of sorrow as they came, and I was trusting that He would give me the capacity to have space for both grief and hope. Grief was so overwhelming at times while hope was the ever-present constant knowing that I would see my loved ones again one day because of the promise of heaven.
Over the next several months, as I began to move forward and read condolence cards, a handwritten note on a sympathy card got me thinking: “What a legacy your mom left you.” It is a true statement that convicted me of my own legacy and one that inspired this writing.
Everyone will leave a legacy, and every legacy has a timeline consisting of three parts: our past, present and future. My past legacy began with two parents who loved the Lord, chose to serve Him daily and did their very best to raise my four siblings and me in the admonition of the Lord. I remember reading Joshua 24:15 in our home every day while growing up: “Choose this day whom you will serve . . . But for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” My past legacy also includes several years of me not choosing to serve the Lord, and I am eternally grateful for Ephesians 1:7—“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight.” I cannot change my past, but I can learn from it and not wear shame or condemnation around like a comfortable coat.
Which brings me to my present legacy.
Learning to live without my mom’s physical presence is one of the challenges now. Another one is what to do with the time I spent talking on the phone to her every day. I’m also wondering more about heaven than ever before. I’m mindful of my godly heritage and choose to serve the Lord every day, being intentional in relationships and walking in a manner worthy of the gospel.
I know many women who are not as fortunate and have yet to begin living their own legacy for themselves and their families. May I encourage you to start today? Start talking to the Lord, start talking to other godly women, start listening to worship music, start reading your Bible, just start with one godly decision.
Ruth also grew up without a godly heritage and look what her decision for God did in her life. Do you think Ruth knew what her legacy would be the day she made a covenant with Naomi and God with her words—“Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried” (Ruth 1:16-17)?
Which brings me to my future legacy.
I’ve asked myself several questions these last few months about my legacy:
- Who invested in my life?
- Who am I investing in both inside and outside of my family?
- Do I have a heart for spiritual multiplication?
As I am more mindful of my own legacy since my mom’s passing, God has shown me creative ways to connect with women who come through the doors of my church. These are the groups that I started calling/texting: new members, Moms of First Graders, Moms of Newborns, and women who are getting baptized. You just might find a few women who need encouragement, prayer, a friend, and a starting point in their own legacy.
I am sure that Tamar, Rahab, Ruth, and Bathsheba had no idea that Jesus would be part of their legacy, BUT GOD knew. Choose to serve the Lord every day and He will do great things with your legacy.
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6
